Date: Dec 16, 2004 12:42 PM
Subject: well well well...

If it isn't Thomas W., proud owner of the rapevan. Remember me? (The Julia half of Julia*****...neither of us can commit to a whole myspace page.) Cloyne lingerie party? Circa October? Boozerun to Safeway followed by mild hallway makeout?

It's good to find you as fucking cute as ever. Drop me a line...I'd love to run into you again.
julia


Date: Dec 22, 2004 12:43 AM
Subject: i will assume one of three things...

1) that you've been staying up nights, piecing together word by word the perfect reply. clever, but not overly so. nonchalant, but not to the point of being an overt brush-off. properly punctuated and full of descriptive adjectives? all lowercase and brimming with colloquialisms? displaying full philosophical flourish, or humbly toned down?

2) that your immediate reaction was aversion to the banal/vapid nature of julia***** as a myspace page. i mean, like, why would you waste your time on some girl, however cute, who refuses to take the time to perfect the level of intrigue aroused by her myspace profile?

3) that you're struggling to remember who this mysterious girl is who is writing you mysterious messages, and that you're waiting for that spark of recognition before you send your reply. perhaps you're a black-out drinker; this cute-girl-memory-omission happens to you often, and you have to carefully sift through the messages to decide which among the onslaught deserves your response.

one of those, or you think i'm nuts: i'm sending you a second unsolicited message. a particularly and unnecessarily long one at that. regardless, i think you're dreamy, and i was pleased to happen across your profile. i'll leave you alone after this one, i swear. but you know, up late, bored, looking to stir up trouble, yada yada.
julia


Date: Dec 22, 2004 12:53 AM
Subject: RE: i will assume one of three things...

touche'. The truth is, I've been in the shower for 186 hours straight, I'm going for a record and Guiness has allowed for a ten minuite break for email replies. See you in another week.


Date: Dec 22, 2004 09:52 AM
Subject: RE: RE: i will assume one of three things...

go for the gold, man. and what you really need here, clearly, is a waterproofed laptop. maybe on some kind of harness so you wouldn't drop it? where IS your foresight, anyway? hopefully you thought to install a garbage disposal in the shower, a la kramer.